Nausea and New Beginnings: My HRT Journey Finally Starts

Last week, I left you at the point where I had managed to bag a telephone appointment that very morning to talk to my doctor. She called me just after 10 a.m., apologising for the blood pressure machine not working properly. She said she didn’t want to put me on blood pressure medication yet but wanted to keep an eye on it. I could feel the lump in my throat growing as I told her I was confident it was caused by the constant stress of trying to get HRT.

She then said the magic words. Let’s get you started on HRT. She said she would send my prescription to the chemist immediately, but she would like me to call back with a BP reading in 4 weeks. She also wanted to run some blood tests and do an ECG, so I needed to book into that. I had stopped taking anything in at that point. I needed to get myself ready. I could not get to that chemist fast enough, and as soon as I was home, I was slathering on that oestrogen gel as instructed.

That night, I went to the besties for dinner and a few glasses of red. I felt like I had something to celebrate. The husband picked me up at about 10:30, and I took my two progesterone pills before bed.

I woke up the following morning after an amazing, uninterrupted sleep. I still felt groggy, but I put that down to the red wine from last night. I hadn’t drunk loads, but maybe it was that and the fact that my body had finally relaxed. As I lounged in the chair, I started to feel really sick. This is odd. I certainly didn’t drink enough to warrant throwing up. In the end, I went back to bed. I was exhausted and hoped that lying down would stop me from feeling like I was at sea on choppy waves.

I, of course, googled it and found that the first few days of HRT can make you nauseous, so I spent the day in bed, in and out of sleep. I had zero energy, so I just allowed myself to rest so I think after the last few months, I deserved it. I had got my appetite back a bit after drinking some ginger tea to ease the nausea, and even though I had a nap during the day, I still found myself really tired in the evening, so I took myself off to bed at ten and had another blissful 8 hours sleep.

I felt a little sick when I woke up on Friday, but not as bad. I had a bit of a headache and felt almost like I was coming down with something. I managed to finish some work that morning, but the tiredness lingered. I was supposed to go to my friends for drinks in the evening, but I decided to postpone. I had experienced side effects when taking antidepressants, and I know they usually go away after a few days. Fingers crossed.

After a 3rd night of good sleep, I thankfully had a day of nothingness planned on Saturday, although the nausea stuck around. I loafed around all day watching films, writing and messaging the girls about outfits for the following day. For some reason, Saturday night’s sleep wasn’t as restful. I still slept, but I felt restless and woke up feeling a bit more yuck than the past two days. But I was determined not to let it ruin my afternoon at Quaglinos, and I didn’t.

I had a great time and felt like I let my hair down, but when Monday came, I felt crap. I felt tearful in the morning and, If I’m honest, pissed off. After being on the pill for most of my adult life to improve my skin and to prevent having kids, it can’t be good for my body. I came off it to give my body a rest, and now I have to slather gel on my legs every single day and pop a pill for 11 days each month. My mental load is increasing, and at the moment, I could really do without it.

Of course, the HRT hasn’t kicked in yet, and my usual impatience isn’t helping. I am disappointed about that because I will not miraculously feel better overnight. I google how long HRT takes to kick in, and I’m sad to see that it would be at least 6-8 weeks. I remind myself that I’ve come so far, but I can’t help but feel my anger bubble at the fact that if someone had just listened to me sooner, I wouldn’t be going through this at all.

I allowed myself a chilled day before having a jam-packed Tuesday with a counselling session and then meeting my friend in London in the afternoon, and I needed to get some work done before that.

Again, I enjoyed my day and felt relaxed and happy, but my sleep was disturbed that night, and I felt really low the next day. I cried a few times, locking myself in the bathroom and then out in the garden. I felt overwhelming sadness, but I was sick and tired of bothering other people with it. I didn’t even know what I would have said anyway.

I realised that even though I have drastically cut back on my alcohol intake over the last year, I may need to cut back some more if this misery continues to happen after having alcohol.

As I lay in bed that night, having another cry over this TikTok video, I decided to order Lisa Snowden’s book and that tomorrow, I will get up and out for a walk and focus on what I can control.

2023-10-12 12:53:00