A productive day

Thursday 14th May

I wake up nice and early today and decide to log on early. I do my first weigh in of the week, no change, thats quite disappointing.

I put on some programs I’ve recorded. In one program, a guy is buying his girlfriend some jewellery and it made me realise how little material things actually mean, not just now but always. Whenever its my birthday or Christmas and the husband asks what I want, its never stuff, its time, I want to go places, see things, spend time together. I don’t actually “need” anything. I find it odd that people can be so obsessed by things, I’d just never thought about it before. Its even more obvious now we’re all in lockdown.

I had some prosecco last night, I hadn’t drank since Saturday so I guess I felt like I deserved it, especially as I had managed to resist the last couple of stressful days. Today determined to do better and to not have a drink. Doing Mind Your Fitness is definately helping me. Usually, if I had a bad day with food or drink, that would be all the encouragement I need to give up for the week and start again next week, but now it makes me more focused on being better, I accept that I enjoyed that day (sometimes a bit too much) and I want to put some damage control in place so I don’t undo all my hard work. Its taken a long time for my brain to understand this, but its like I’ve changed something in my mindset and the fuck it button is getting further and further out of reach

Not only am I productive with my food and drink, I’m productive at work, resolving to get on with it, as long as my boss is leaving me alone and not bothering me all day, I can deal with it, its highly unlikely they’re going to get rid of him in this climate.

The husband goes off to golf and I have a rare few hours alone, I decide to clean out my kitchen cupboard, which is rather satisfying, throwing out old food and changing things around a bit. I then settle down with my Gousto Chicken Milanese and watch a horror film.

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