My own worst enemy

Saturday 30th May 2020

A glorious night of broken sleep. I don’t even want to get up, let alone weigh and measure myself.
The results aren’t good, as expected. 3lb and 5cm on. It’s a new week and almost a new month, a fresh start.
I check in with the mind your fitness group, I feel like an idiot, I haven’t even tried this week.

The husband gets up and asks me if I want an IPad as a belated birthday gift as it doesn’t look like we’re going to have the weekend away he’d originally planned anytime soon. I’ve been thinking about getting one for a while, so I of course say yes. How exciting!

Kristy responds to my check in, after we chat she reminds me that I haven’t taken an average weight this week, so the number on the scales won’t be correct, also rather than tell me off or make me feel bad, she asks me to think of some positive things that have happened. When I tell her I realise that it isn’t all bad and that I can turn this around. I love this group!! Enrolments are open for the next group if you‘re interested Kristy_mindyourfitness on Facebook or @kristy_mindyourfitness on insta

With renewed vigour, I plan my week, meals, exercise, I even throw in some meditation. Why not. The husband is planning on doing a bbq, so I plan my calories accordingly, to include the bottle of rose wine the bestie got us for our anniversary. This was my mistake.

I literally feel my mood sink, rapidly. The alcohol makes me feel, miserable, angry and sad. I start to be annoyed, with both myself and the husband. I start picking at myself, almost like I’m having a drunken argument with myself in my head. Why is it you say things to yourself that you wouldn’t say to your worst enemy.

Eventually some sensible part breaks through the tired, mean part of me and tells me to go to bed. Surprisingly I listened.

#Lifestyle #Blogging #SelfCare #SelfLove #Positivity #Wellness #blog #blogger #bloggers #blogpost #quarantine #quarantinelife #lockdown #mentalhealth #mentalhealthawareness #anxiety #depression #health #mentalillness #recovery #psychology #healing #mentalhealthmatters #life #happiness #stress #wellbeing #overwhelmed #awareness #mindyourfitness

2020-05-30 09:53:00

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *